Just North of Wrigley Field

posted by James - 1:30 AM

Whew! I hope you're ready for some reading. I have in it's complete, yet unbelievably-edited, entirety the latest edition of Just Another Monday Night.


JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: hey there!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: What's up C-dizzle!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: not a lot J-fizzle!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: have you heard anything about Raw tonight?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: No, I haven't really checked either, but I'm pretty excited to see what happens. I hope you're TiVo-ing it
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: hell, I'm going to watch it live
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Even better
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: brb Scott is getting his eyebrows waxed by Heather and I have to watch this
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: You should take pictures!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe even record sound!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: They made me do it too
(Sympathy pains from JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: what? did you take pictures?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: no, Scott can't find my camera
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: you lost your camera?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah, Scott did
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: not very happy about it
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: blah blah. It's your camera and it's lost, so you lost your camera
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: what a bunch of crap
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: somebody's cut off! lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: did you take collateral?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: wrestling is on in a half hour
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: this should be a good show
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: hell yeah
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I should be done recording Most Xtreme Challenge by the time wrestling is on
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: and what if you're not?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I will I only have a few left to record
(For all you Just North of Wrigley Field Kitchen fans)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: hold on... I'm making hamburgers.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: make me one
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: no problem... kicking it up with some garlic, carrot and a little chile. I'll leave the onion out of yours
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: damn that sounds good
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: hell yeah... I'm going to marinate it overnight too with some honey barbecue sauce
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is going to rock!. They had some .99c/lb ground beef at the local European grocery store so I was all over that!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: hell yeah
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I’m recording MXC #19
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: 20 MXC's man that is great
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: all on one tape
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: 5 minutes and counting
(Raw opens with the GMs of Raw and Smackdown! on opposing sides ready to make the selections to determine the immediate future of both shows. Smackdown! GM Paul Heyman makes his first choice… it’s 20-year-old French Canadian Rene Dupree, who marches down to the ring for his last appearance on Raw and challenges anyone from the back for one more shot of the "Phrench Phenom.")
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol... Steve Austin giving me a Stunn-ERE! lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: DOES HE WANT A MATCH NOW?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: is this how this is going to work?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: you get drafted and fight?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I don't know... I figured they'd have Cole and Tazz call this match because it has a SD wrestler... but who knows?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: no idea
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Stone Cold
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: hell yeah!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: he looks unusually happy
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Stunner on the mic. Ouch!
(Burger King shows their new “get it your way” whopper commercial, which they play at least twice more during the 2 hour program.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that was great
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: "wanna kiss ’em?"
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol... I didn't get that until you said that.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: who is in the ring and why?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Rico will be facing the newest Raw wrestler
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: ah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: That's what I think
(Raw GM Eric Bischoff reaches in to make his first pick and picks former Smackdown! Tag Team Champion Shelton Benjamin, though he couldn’t help drawing it out for a while. This apparently will split Benjamin from his long-term tag-team partner Charile Haas.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: get on with it!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I like these two as singles wrestlers
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: wow, Benjamin’s 245 lbs?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: …or maybe Kane will come beat up Rico!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: For once, I'm actually glad I'm wrong!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: That was a cool sign.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: what did the sign say?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: it was just a painting of Kane in his old mask
(Kane departs after quickly disposing of Rico and heads toward the top of the ramp. He grabs both GMs menacingly, then does something that should be out of character for a 7-foot, 300 lb monster.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: “several expletives directed at Kane”, after he begs, nay demands, to be put on the opposite show of the guy who kicked his ass at Wrestlemania… the Undertaker
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: little bitch
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I thought he was going to say the opposite
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: same here
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: who's the jackass who came up with Kane looking like such a little bitch?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: “expletive directed at the WWE writers”
(Heyman reaches into the gold mesh “bingo-style” basket and pulls out the next ball.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: it's like Easter
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: open the little plastic egg
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: they should have little eggs with wrestlers painted on them
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
(Heyman pontificates about his newest selection and the possibilities of ruining something good about Bischoff’s show by breaking a long-standing team.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: the Dudleys?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: D-Von?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Lawler?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I don't think so. Orton?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: who?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: “expletive directed at WWE, once again” (that’s two if you’re counting at home… still below average.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Jindrak
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is starting to reek of sucktitude
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: blue chipper! blue chipper! blue chipper!... shut up Cole
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: He's not a blue chipper. He's a cow chipper.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: dude... my cat is freaking out about a fruit fly
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol I wish you could take a picture.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Everytime you want to take a picture and can't, you should throw something at Scott!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I know
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: no really. That should be the payback (until you get a new camera).
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: like get some foam balls or something
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: it's better than getting smacked in the back of the head.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: he he
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ok.. I'm pretty sure each GM will pick 12 names
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: but are they all going to be retards
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: not all of them... Benjamin isn't a retard
(Bischoff reaches in for his second pick and hints at a feminine addition to the Raw roster… and no I don’t mean Billy Gunn)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Sable?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Torrie?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ugh
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Nidia
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: she of the new breastsesses
(Nidia enters the arena with a Smackdown! shirt on. As they did for all the draftees, they flashed their “tale of the tape” like in boxing.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol measurements
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah, those look good
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: they'll put Nidia and Maven back together
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: she's gonna have to take off that shirt.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I would be pissed if I were at the arena
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: “expletive directed at the cameraperson who was in the middle of the shot of Nidia taking off her shirt”
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe he should have had Raw bras made
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that shirt is huge
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I'd throw that at Heyman. lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I like her boobs
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: they don't look bad
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: they look great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah, I mean they don't look obvious like she just had surgery. They don't look out of place on her body
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: so she'll still be a good wrestler
(Smackdown! wrestler John Cena’s music hits and he busts freestyle in his old-school Barry Sanders jersey on Heyman and Bischoff and ends up grabbing the next ball for Heyman.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: here we go!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: thug-a-nomics
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Barry Sanders, baby!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I love Cena vs Heyman!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: they're great together.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Cena's just plain great
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that was great!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe they'll put him on Raw now. That went really well with a live audience
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: where is Vince?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah... He was there earlier
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: this should be a good pick
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: these two are doing a good job although they need to do less talking and more picking
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: blah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah, exactly
(Heyman reluctantly opens the ball Cena handed him and comes up with the first shock of the night… long-time Raw superstar and Evolution leader Triple H going to Smackdown)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: OH
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: HOLY…
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that was good
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: now, that was a twist
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe they'll have Cena vs Triple H... or maybe have him team with Angle against Guerrero.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I wonder what trades they'll do after the show.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I think they should have someone come down and steal Brock Lesnar's F5. A big heel... maybe Matt Morgan. It would give someone to feud with instantly when he came back.
(Back from the break, they show the aftermath of Triple H’s selection to the Smackdown! brand. The rest of the Raw wrestlers serenade him with a rendition of “Na Na Na Na Hey Hey Hey Goodbye!” and Creepy Christian, with his new girlfriend Creepy Trish, come to the ring to face Spike Dudley.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: J.R. really needs to get out more often
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: If Triple H ever comes back to Raw (via trade maybe?), he's going to be pissed at everyone of those peons who chanted at him.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol... I thought that was a cape on Trish when I first saw that. It looks terrible and it covers up her butt, which is what they pay to see.
(Spike rips off his shirt for the first time since… ever.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: GO SPIKE GO! GO SPIKE GO! GO SPIKE GO!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Obviously, Trish read Stephanie McMahon's latest self-help book, "How to Look Like a $2 Dollar Slut-ah" with a foreword by the Rock.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ... or maybe Sable could write the foreword I don't know.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: If Trish was a book, Lawler wants to read her in Braille. That's great Lawler. I can't wait until you suffer a debilitating voice injury.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
(Bischoff goes to Vince to try to “lawyer” his way out of losing Triple H, but Heyman ups the ante giving Triple H a title shot tonight against his champion, Eddie Guerrero. Bischoff tries to make an equally grandiose announcement concerning his champion, Chris Benoit, and his next selection for Raw.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: wah wah wah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: shut up Bischoff
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: na na na na hey hey hey good bye
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that sucks.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I love the match, but it belongs on Smackdown!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: they better have something big planned for the Raw side if they're giving away HHH vs Guerrero on Raw TV
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: he's going to get Funaki lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Cole?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Cena?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Funaki vs Chris Benoit!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ahhh... Bisch your mouth writes checks your ass can't cash!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ...or maybe not? Kurt Angle!!!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Rhyno
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: wow
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: wow... Benoit vs Rhyno. Smackdown! gets to show us Triple H vs Guerrero and Raw only gets Benoit vs Rhyno. Which show am I watching again?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Abusing Heyman will always get you cheap face heat!
(Spike TV shows a commercial for their newest animated feature… the one with Ted Kennedy drunk, which in fact isn’t far from reality.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that looks funny
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah, I've said that about a lot of cartoons from their commercial promos.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: true
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: there are a lot of commercials on this episode
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is really a bad time for me to work anything new into the schedule since I'm still wrapping up my fantasy hockey and basketball season, March Madness is upon us, we're just coming off of Wrestlemania and baseball is right around the corner. Add my usuals like The West Wing into that, and there's no time for anything new.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
(Raw Tag Champions Booker T and Rob Van Dam come out and defend their title against former champions Evolution members Ric Flair and Batista.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Booker T and RVD have the worst train wreck for a theme music. It's like an audio montage
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ... for you arts and crafts dweebs out there.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: those pyro's should set Heyman’s stand on fire
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: He could just get worse and worse through the night
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: He comes in with a broken neck, which he swears he’ll get Taker back for
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Then he gets throttled by Kane a little bit
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Then he gets a pyro flame up his butt
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Then Taker can chokeslam him off the podium and make the last pick himself... "That will give you something to get revenge over."
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: midnight deadline on trades
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Did they just say that?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: until tonight?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: check WWE.com for updates
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ok
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that's what they said
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I missed that somehow. I was too busy of thinking of ways to torture Paul Heyman
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: wow they are updating the draft quickly
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: the picks are already up there
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: They could do so much more with WWE.com. They could have a big list of names online and the pool they are picking from
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ok... maybe they do. lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: oh... I think Batista just got a thrust kick to the nether-regions!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: each one only gets 6 picks
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: but that is lame
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: i thought it was going to be more than 6
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: a little bit. Raw is getting hosed so far
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I don't see 3 guys on Smackdown! who can make up for losing Triple H
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah this hasn't done a lot for them
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: …but this gives Stephanie and Trip a chance to work together again
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe, unless she gets picked for Raw.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah... but that would be a waste unless Raw gets Bischoff or Austin. Raw would have 3 gm's
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: What happens if Heyman gets Bisch?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: That is a cool little feature they have up on WWE.com about the draft... but it would be much cooler with a list of guys who were available. Is the Rock available? Is Edge available? Are Heyman and Bischoff available?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: They have Trip, RVD, Big Show, and Cena on a pic for the draft. One of those guys already traded shows, could that be a sign?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: After they built it up, they have to have at least one champion trade shows, right?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: you would think so
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: ...and Benoit would be my choice
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Really... you'd send Benoit back to Smackdown!?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: he would fit in better there
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah I think there are more of his style wrestlers there
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I think there used to be before Lesnar left and Angle might be injured.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ...and Benjamin moved to Raw too.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: what would you do with the World Heavyweight Title then?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: a one-night tourney. Eight men involved like the Elite-8 in the NCAA
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: take advantage of March Madness
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that would be appropriate. tis the season.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: (singing) tis the season for lots of tourneys!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe even make it so you could fill out a bracket online at WWE.com
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: the winner would have to fight three times in one night
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I'd like that... especially if all us suckers who picked Kentucky could get another shot at brackets!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I'll give RVD and Booker T credit for teamwork! You don't see many teams using team-oriented moves, and they might be splitting up the ones that do (Benjamin/Haas and Jindrak/Cade).
(RVD costs his team the title after mistakenly kicking his tag-team partner in the back of the head. Flair and Batista are tag champions for the second time.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that gives Evolution something to do
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that was a great shot by RVD
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: clumsy RVD
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe RVD should lay off his special seasoning before matches from now on
(Benoit starts hour two of Raw with his title defense against Rhyno, while RVD and Booker T receive the news that they not only lost their tag belts, but their rematch too because Heyman called RVD as the newest member of Smackdown! )
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that's a new belt
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: new design
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah, the last one had Triple H permanently inscribed on it
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: they all do
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: mmmm what ever Heather is cooking smells great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: CAN YOU SMELL LALALALALALA WHAT YOUR CHICK IS COOKING???
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: she is laughing at you
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: holy crap! How can they make this even now that Smackdown! has Triple H and RVD?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Who could they move over to Raw?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: wow! They are updating the site fast
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: they have RVD on there already
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: well... for the clueless cover your ears... but they already know who's going where. lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I guess I shouldn't say clueless, just the naive who haven't spent as much time backstage at wrestling events as us.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: ...and still think this is unscripted.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: they’re doing this now?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah... there's so much left to go in this show.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: well, that makes the Smackdown! fight the main event
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: which makes no frickin’ sense
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: GORE
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: GORE
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: GORE
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Rhyno looks great tonight
(Benoit dodges the Gore and locks on the Crippler Crossface for the submission victory. Shawn Michaels watches from behind and is torn between following his long-time fued with Triple H to Smackdown! or pursuing his long-time obsession with the World Title on Raw.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that's in tight!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: NICE
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: we still have 5 picks to go
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: and only a half hour
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: 45 mins at most
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I think they should move Cena over and then have your tournament for the U.S. Title on Smackdown! (though I guess they already had a tournament for that title).
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I don’t want HBK to get traded
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I want him to get a shot at Triple H
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: HELL YEAH
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: HBK says... "This time The kick is gonna stick."
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: sounds like a T-shirt there
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yup
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe with a rosary bead motif or something
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: ok back with food
(With the show coming to an end, Raw and Smackdown! move into lightning round... which starts with the odd selection of Taijiri from Smackdown!, where they have a title specifically for cruiserweights like him, to Raw.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: shut up Heyman. Give some food to Heyman so he'll shut up
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: what?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: “expletive directed at WWE”
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: what's the point in this? What are they doing to Raw?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Taijiri for Trip?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: and RVD
(Smackdown then selects manager and CEO of Thuggin’ and Buggin’ Enterprises Theodore Long.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: LOL
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: thuggin' and buggin' on Smackdown!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: belee' dat playa!
(Raw gets their first potential superstar with Edge, who is coming back from injury.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Edge!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: wow! Raw finally got someone half-decent
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: We already knew Raw was going to get Edge
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: That should have happened anyways to balance out the lopsidedness of this draft so far
(Smackdown!’s final pick is Spike Dudley, who lost to Christian earlier that night, setting up the final pick for Raw.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that almost makes up for it.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Taker?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Stephanie?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Heyman?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Heyman?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol give him back, Bischoff. lol
JJUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Steph is back
UST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: ...and going to help Trip on Smackdown!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: He might fire Heyman
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: and then Heyman will end up on ECW
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: trade?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: trade with who?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: he quits!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this is great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Vince needs to come out and explain.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: does Bisch get another pick?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: that was his pick
(Bischoff makes it down to the ring gloating over his great fortune in selecting Heyman. Edge interrupts him.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: here comes Steph?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: hit Vince’s music
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Edge?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I was expecting "No Chance..." as well
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: he looks great
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: SPEAR
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: very heelish spear too
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: and this isn't the end of the show yet
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Yeah, still a lot of time left
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I'm still expecting the new GM to come out by the end of the show. Vince is there why not use him?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: no title holders changed shows
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: no, they took it from RVD before it could happen.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: or no one with a belt got picked
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I was hoping Booker T would move instead. He'd be great with Teddy Long.
(Triple H stands at the top of the entrance ramp awash in his familiar multicolored light effects. He adorned a Raw T-Shirt before ripping it off, revealing a Smackdown! T-Shirt underneath and making his way for his match against Guerrero.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: That was an awesome shot with the contrast between the red Raw shirt and the Blue Smackdown! shirt.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Have Trip and Eddie ever faced each other?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: when Eddie first came over with Benoit... I think so
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: yeah, probably during the Radicalz.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: lol... watch out Eddie. Trip invented lying, cheating and stealing (other people's career aspirations).
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I am not enjoying listening to Cole right now
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: man, now i feel fat
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that was a lot of food
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: phat? Maybe you could be Teddy Long's new client. I don't know who he's going to manage on SD.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Here comes Teddy Long and Skip-dizzle!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: fo shizzle my nizzles
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I feel ya playa
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: so who comes down Steph or Vince?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Vince... with Steph after.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: We haven't seen Foley at all tonight either.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: and Stone Cold hasn't done a whole lot
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: maybe Vince will offer it to Stone Cold and he'll decline name a new GM and then stunner Vince.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: and does Trip win or does Eddie via distraction?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: There's no way they take the title away from Eddie.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Eddie looks so small compared to Trip
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Definitely two different styles.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: wow the crowd is dead.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: of course they are this is a Smackdown! main event on Raw
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: good point
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: this doesn't mean anything to Raw
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I'd be booing the whole time. booing them off the stage until Austin came down and broke it up.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: if I hadn't paid good money to be there I might have left
(Trip’s former Evolution running mates Batista and Flair come down to ringside starting a Red and Blue avalanche of wrestlers from both shows in from the back culminating in an unprecedented brawl and nullifying the main event.)
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Evolution screwing Smackdown!?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Evolution? Hmmm... maybe they should screw Triple-H out of the title.
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: where are the Smackdown! people?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: all out brawl!
(Michaels enters the ring and gives Trip a parting shot with some Sweet Chin Music.)
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: HBK
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: This is great. I want to see them all brawl on the outside
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: all hell is breaking loose
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: It's a slobber knocker all over the place!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: It's like Superman's undies started fighting each other!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that was the funniest thing I've ever heard
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Taker?
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: where are you?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: where is Taker?
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I want the bells!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: all four announcers are calling this
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Stone Cold!!!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Stone Cold!!!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: Stone Cold!!!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Here comes the law!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: Come on Stone Cold get up off your hoss!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: This is the best ever. I'm frickin serious!
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: this could go on all night and I'd love it
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: that was a great show
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I can't wait to read the post-Raw recaps online and see what happened after the cameras shut off
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: yeah, that's true
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: I think that was supposed to run a little longer or start sooner
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I don't know why they couldn't have asked Spike TV to go to 10:20. Shut off a 60-man brawl for Stripperella? Heck, if they needed the T&A just let the women go at it too.
JUST NORTH OF WRIGLEY FIELD: I thought this was the first network for men!
JUST WEST OF SAFECO FIELD: lol

Thus ends a pretty amazing episode of Raw with an ending that needed to be seen to understand the "holy ----" factor. They didn't do everything right of course, but for a "WWE-standard" landmark episode, it gave me the amount of misses I expected and even bigger high points.